Thursday, 21 April 2016

"You would be so pretty if you would dress normally"

Ever heard this one? Well, me too, and somehow it´s really annoying.
Some people just don´t get it...

I remember once, when I wanted to win a bet, I had to dress "normally" for a week. It was so weird, I didn´t feel like myself, but so many people kept telling me, that I looked so pretty and nice as a "normal" person. And I was like WHAT?! 
It was not the only time I was told that if I wouldn´t dress so-and-so I would be so pretty.
Am I not pretty as a goth? Can only "normal" looking people be pretty?
Of course not!

I don´t understand why can´t some people just accept, that what´s pretty for them musn´t be pretty for another. I didn´t feel pretty without my black, without my collar, chains, fishnet and without black eyeshadow. It wasn´t me. And I was nervous and unsure. I felt like a poser, trying to be something I´m not. But they were so convinced that I would start to like that "normal" look and would stay that way. It was little bit funny, but at the same time, it was really annoying.
I remember, that when the week of dressing "normally" was over, I pulled out my blackest black and was so happy.
And people around me were like: "Oh, again in black?" You could see the disappointment in their faces.
Somehow I have to ask they think, that I would wear something in what I would feel ugly? Don´t they see, that I´m happier in what I love to wear?
But I´m lucky, because well, many of my friends are alternative, too. And from them I heard the words I wanted to hear: "You look better this way." :D

Now I´m quite happy to be working in a place, where colleagues accepted that I´m a weirdo. :D I can´t wear totally what I want, I still have to wear some working clothing, but I can at least wear the collars I love so much. :D

The best advice I can give you: "Always be yourself and wear what makes you feel pretty". ;)


  1. You look very pretty as a goth! More likely than not, those critical of your style are jealous. Deep down they know that you look fabulous and they would like to look that way too, but they are afraid of what others would say if they adopted a similar style.

    Gothic style is awesome, and I'm glad that some people, such as yourself, continue dressing so beautifully.

    1. Thank you very much. :3 And yeah, I think that sometimes, too. To be honest, I get praise more than hate, even from older people, so I can´t complain much. but this somehow stuck in my mind and I remember people being like that when I was starting with this style. :D

  2. Yeah, I know what you're talking about! I think that mostly it's easy being alternative in Finland, because there are so much alternative people. Nowadays even blue hair is widely accepted, depending on where you live. But of course there are always the ones who just love to say mean things to strangers or tell me how lovely I would look without my studs or with long hair. I usually tell them kindly why exactly I look like "this", but I don't need to tolerate any clear insults. To them I'll respond "bitch please I'm fabulous" or something like that :D

    Be proud of who you are. Being able to find your own style is one of the greatest things :) And you look great!

    1. Well, I live it that part of the world, where we would be safe even when the world ended...because we are ten years behind everyone and everything. :D It´s still weird here being alternative. It´s better in the capital city, but I live at the other end of the country. There are hardly any goths here, but at least we have metalheads and punks, which is nice.
      I don´t think people who don´t like people who are different will ever vanish. There will always be rude people who will insuslt others or people who just don´t understand that beauty means something different for everyone. But, it´s mostly fun being the weirdo.:D